Addiction: A Spiritual Crisis: The Thirst for Wholeness and Addiction
At one time or another, most of us feel
some degree of emptiness, loneliness, inadequacy, idealism, or spiritual
longing. We recognise the discontent, the desire to escape pain, and the
tendency to seek answers in activities, substances, or relationships. This
sense of restlessness and the spiritual longing is familiar to many of
us.
Over the many years of treating addiction
and co-dependency I have heard many people talk about a non-specific hunger for
something that seems to be missing in their lives. They describe a gnawing
emptiness within that is never filled. This insistent stirring from within is
so intense that it can, at times, be painful. It seems to originate at one’s very
core, and for some of us, it feels even stronger than our sexual drive or our
hunger for food.
I was aware of it as a child, and I tried
somehow to fill it by spending hours and hours playing pinball machines and
snooker, watching television and listening to music on my transistor radio, or
participating in sports. I struggled with it as a teenager, I felt it as a
young adult when I looked at a particularly magnificent painting, read an
eloquent poem, or watched an exquisite dance. And it manifested during a
multitude of other restive moments. The pit of my stomach felt empty, my heart
hurt, and my entire being aspired toward something I could not identify.
As I grew, the ache in my soul
increasingly permeated all aspects of my life. I felt monumentally homesick for
something undefined, for an unnamed entity, place, or experience. Nothing I did
seemed to alleviate the yearning within me.
There are, I am sure, some fortunate
people who feel this longing but do not act upon it in painful ways. However,
many people identify the spiritual yearning as a persistent voice in their
lives, one they often confuse with their everyday aspirations. At first, they
identify it as the desire to excel on the playing field, to develop their
intellect, to get into the right university, or to meet the man or woman of
their dreams. Perhaps they feel an overwhelming craving for a certain model of
car, for a new outfit, or for sexual contact.
This fundamental appetite might manifest
in the abuse of food, alcohol, nicotine, or other drugs. Some people feel a
general dissatisfaction in their marriage and find themselves longing for
something more: a new house, a baby, a significant change in their partner’s
behaviour, or a completely different relationship. They feel discontented, as
though something is lacking. Perhaps more money would bring happiness, or a
better social position, or a new job.
I loved my wife and kids, was satisfied
with my business, and felt reasonably good about my accomplishments. But
something was missing. I found myself thinking about moving to another state or
country and even trying another line of business. I soon began to gamble too
much, as well as abuse various mood altering drugs. After a while, I realised
that none of those things would help my feelings of emptiness, and in fact,
they had begun to cause more problems than they would solve. I felt stuck.”
The irony is, no external activities or
substances satisfy the initial craving or the feelings of emptiness. Many
people attain the object of their desire, and the incessant ache remains. One
person may win the lotto or player-of-the-year award for football, another earn
an advanced degree from a prestigious university. Someone else might capture
the heart of a perfect mate, make enough money, and live in the style he or she
has always wished for.
Yet, even in the midst of the bounty that
is meant to bring satisfaction and fulfilment, the yearning persists, perhaps
even magnified by the achievements, which only remind us of the emptiness
within. Many recovering addicts and alcoholics report that once the physical
craving for the drug or behaviour is eliminated, a deeper craving still
remains.
As a culture, we do not have many
sanctioned frame-works in which to deeply experience and satisfy the yearning
for wholeness. As a result, people of all ages distort and misdirect this
immensely strong impulse into addictions of all kinds, and co-dependency, not
only addictions involving the use of chemicals (alcohol & drugs), but
also eating disorders, sexual and love addictions, and addictions to power,
money, relationships, gambling, and countless other addictive activities.
What is this free-floating yearning? I
believe that Jung was right. This intense and at times painful craving is deep
thirst for our own wholeness, our spiritual identity, our divine source, or
God.
This place of wholeness we seek is our
spiritual core, an essential component of our nature.
Development of a relationship with this
inner source is a common, and necessary, aspect of human existence. I believe
that this thirst for wholeness is the main driving force in the ever increasing
rates of addiction in our society.
Unless this factor is addressed in
recovery and addiction treatment, the individual is always going to remain at
high risk of relapse or in danger of switching addictions. Simply stopping our
addictive behaviours or replacing them with legal substitute drugs is not
enough and doesn’t work.
For any assistance for you or a loved one struggling with addiction, contact Coaching with Substance on 07 5606 6315 or email: info@coachingwithsubstance.org.au
We are Australia's leading award winning addiction treatment and rehab consultants for gambling, drugs, alcohol, sex, eating and internet addiction, along with eating behavioural disorders and co-dependency for Australasia and New Zealand.
Maria Pau is a 4x No. 1 best-selling author on the subjects of addiction and co-dependency and spiritual wellness. She is the Program Director of Coaching with Substance, the first of its kind in Australia as registered public benevolent institution, charity and not-for profit association that focuses on wellness using coaching principles of peak performance. We run a cutting edge holistic addiction treatment program and outpatient rehabilitation consultancy firm that ensures you are released from the shackles of addiction once and for all.
Primary care at CWS is personalised to treat each individual using programs that integrate mind, body and soul. CWS programs are enhanced by highly effective group coaching and therapeutic processes as well as individual coaching, spiritual insights, therapy and extensive aftercare assistance.
All clients are thoroughly assessed by a highly trained and experienced recovery coach, registered provisional psychologist, ordained Monk, mental health officer and certified naturopaths (including Ayurveda and Acupuncturist). Clients may also be referred for psychometric testing and assessment, if needed. International clients welcome.
We welcome enquiries from all English speaking people from Asia, Europe, Africa, India and South America.
